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Wednesday, September 2, 2009

San Francisco, Part II: Where'd you get those hydraulics from?

Okay, there is a second side to San Francisco we saw... and it's not just San Francisco, and it's not just California but it's the United States in general.

I must say, I do love the U.S. for some things, many and most of which I've seen on this trip. I love it for Hollywood, it's cheap pizza, it's love of television, it's knowledge of sports (every passerby at a ballpark has been able to have an intelligent conversation about the Blue Jays and their retarded manager J.P. Ricciardi), it's 40 different kinds of potato chips, and it's big cities.

But upon exiting the Giants' game, we clearly saw that negative, uneducated side of this country. We were essentially booed out of AT&T Park by "South Central Los Angeles", even though we had cheered for the Giants all game (I mean, I had money on them... sorry, Mom) and they won.

We've had the dumb cheers at every stadium by people saying, "Blue Jays suck." Yea, that's a good one, how long did it take you to think of that?

But being told, "Get the f*** out of San Francisco!" and being threatened by hoodlums is a little too much. And I'm not even angry about it, I find it quite funny.

However, when three guys who are so cool they cant even grow hair on their head and they have chains that cost more than their mortgage say, "F*** blue!" and flash red t-shirts, let's just take a second and pause...

I know what that means - you think you're a gang and so you don't like people who know how to brush their teeth.

But blue?

That's a colour. I mean, Tupac and Biggie - I got that. I've seen Boyz N Tha Hood - I got that. Hell, I even get the main conflict in The Emperor's New Groove.

But blue?

Go and get your GED and then come talk to me. Maybe read a book, or even a page of a book (and a magazine doesn't count). Until you understand that blue is a colour and that it wasn't invented by a guy wearing an oversized New Era hat on the East Side of North America.

Are you just feeling insecure that your city's biggest celebrity right now is Harvey Milk?

Maybe. But until you get over whatever you're sitting on, please let the 95% of San Francisco that are amazing people take care of things and stop ruining your city's and country's reputation for everybody else.

I'm out.


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